"I am torn in two by a love/hate relationship with this world."
Love me, hate me, I love you, I hate you. That's a brief summary of how life feels, and how it seems to work - for me, at least. Some uncontrollable roller coaster of emotions and events, to which I can only react as best as possible and make the situation something real, and something positive. It's a lot of compromise, a lot of restraint, of hard work. It's commonly quipped that, "Nothing good comes easy", but that doesn't mean I can't dream for a break every once in a while. If not for myself, then for those I love.
There's a lot of positivity going around; be who you are, look how you want, rich, poor, fat, skinny, bold, reserved, it doesn't matter. But, alongside, as always, there's an increase in the superficial. We've become more accepting, and more judgemental at the same time - because there wasn't enough conflict in society in general, so let's plant it in each individual too. Toxicity these days is unavoidable, and that links so strongly to life as a whole, and the issues we face each day. The world itself is full of beauty, and people too - whether inside or out -, but so much poison exists alongside, often masking or distracting from what is 'real', or what is 'good' which in turn creates a deception, a different perception, that leaves you wondering; do I love or hate the world I live in? Do I love or hate my life? Myself? Who knows. I sure as fuck don't.